WHY LVA?
Recently, we had the privilege of hosting our first charity dinner, and during this awesome gathering, I was asked about my ‘why.’ I found myself sharing my deep desire to support my daughter in a way that I never received, so she wouldn’t have to navigate her teenage years feeling lost and unaware of her own worth.
As I was asked during a Q&A about my journey and the experiences of young people I’ve encountered, I was reminded of a young girl I mentored. She came to me when she was in Year 10, and I was informed by the school that she was on the brink of expulsion. In their eyes, there was nothing more they could do, or they just didn’t have the time or ability to help her.
This remarkable young woman had endured unimaginable trxuma. She had been in several abxsive relationships and turned to binge drinking and drxgs as a way to cope, leaving her vulnerable to predatory older men who explxited her. Yet all anyone else saw was a girl who seemed beyond help, someone nobody knew how to reach out to. They didn’t see what I saw: a person in desperate need of support, compassion, and time.
At LVA, we made time for her. I made time for her. Our weekly meetings became a lifeline for her. Surprisingly, the days she met with me were often the only days she attended school. All she truly needed was someone who could hold space for her experiences, someone to guide her through the pain and trxuma while accepting her for who she was. With patience and care, she began to discover her own strengths and potential.
And what a transformation it was! She not only excelled in her GCSEs but also reached out to me as the first person she wanted to share her success with. She went on to pursue A-Levels, becoming a young woman who found her worth and capabilities. All it took was for someone to truly see her.
After sharing her story at our event, I experienced a moment of profound realization: this girl’s journey echoed my own at that age. I was the one who had already been expelled by Year 9, left to navigate a chasm of disappointment and neglect on my own. I understood all too well how it felt to be overlooked, to be told that the school didn’t have a place for me. I fell into a spiral because no one stepped in to fight for me when I desperately needed to be seen and nurtured.
Now, as an adult who has found faith and learned to embrace my own worth, I can finally affirm that I deserved to be seen; I needed someone to invest time in me. The painful, damaging experiences I endured during my early teenage years, which led to self-sabotaging behaviours, could have been averted if just one person had taken the time to care.
I did find my way in the end. I am happily married, a proud parent, a co-founder of LVA, and I'm nearing completion of my MBA. I don’t dwell on the ‘shoulda, woulda, couldas,’ as I know that mindset isn’t healthy. I strive to move forward and be the best I can be! But I acknowledge that I still carry the weight of toxic self-preservation protective behaviours that I had no choice but to develop so I could survive. It’s been a journey of healing, and I’m learning to embrace a softer side of myself, often referenced by Gen Z as ‘stepping into my feminine energy.’ At 38, I finally feel safe to be my authentic self, my favourite self!
This is my true ‘WHY.’ My mission is to turn every experience of trxuma, neglect, and pain into a force for good within LVA, to advocate for every young person in need. While we cannot change the entire world, we believe we can change the world for one young person at a time. That’s the essence of who we are at LVA, and that is our mission!
This Champions for Children campaign 2025 is more than just a fundraiser for us - its personal! if you relate to this story, if it has moved you in anyway - you can be part of our mission too! Your donation can enable LVA to step into the lives of even more young people and ensure they know they LOVED, VALUED, and ABLE!
You can double your impact thanks to The Childhood Trust up to 20K
Give Here: Emotional and Relational Wellbeing – Big Give
———————————————————————————————————————————————————————————-
If anything I have spoken about in this blog has affected you, below are some organisations you can reach out to for support:
GIO Richmond & Kingston: Sexual health, drugs & alcohol services for young people in South West London :: Getting It On :: GIO
NSPCC: Support & advice for parents | NSPCC
Refuge: Refuge, the largest UK domestic abuse organisation for women